This is officially my last post in this blog.I wouldn't want to shut it down,too many memories in here =).But alas,all good things comes to and end.
It's been more than a month since I returned,and as I predicted,lots of things has changed.First things first, from the time I left Auckland,everything has been a disaster.My overnight stop in Bangkok is probably the worst that's ever happened to me,and I'm not too keen to write about it here.My family was supposed to wait for me in the airport,but for some reasons they wasn't..at least not at the time I asked them to.I couldn't call out coz my phone died on me,and thank God I had some Malaysian coins to make a call to my bro,only to find out my mom's already in the airport and waiting in the DOMESTIC ARRIVAL!
OK,I asked her to cook my favourite curry and a spicy sambal,which she didn't.Fine.My dog got lost a few days before I returned home,and she didn't even tell me about it when I called and asked about the dog.Fine.To top it all,my PC crashed,and she blamed it on lighting and thunderstorm,but further examination revealed my motherboard was burnt,and I know it wasn't because of lighting or thunderstorms because all my wires are perfectly insulated,and plus I have used my PC all the time during bad weather,and it never crashed.Fine.
My phone line's been barred,and my internet connection suspended.I spent my first few days negotiating with Maxis and TMNet.The best Maxis could do was investigate my case,thus I had to put my mobile number on hold.Damn.Relatives who saw me commented on how much weight I lost.(OK that's not too bad LOL).But the worst part..the something I actually came back for,the something I actually looked forward to,decided to ditch me and go MIA.
No revealations on that,bt sufficient to say that if I knew all this would happen,I would have refused to board the aircraft even if they threaten to throw me out of the country!
I miss the times where I actually lived day as it comes.No joke.I can sleep all I want,plan my vacations,decide who I associate with,decide if I wanna call home,decide what I eat,decide what to buy,decide where to go,decide what to see..
The trip will have a lasting impact on me,because I feel myself much stronger and much matured now than how I used to be.To make decisions in a split second.To weigh pros and cons.To budget.To do groceries.To plan vacations.Banking.Bills.It's a whole new thing because things in New Zealand is done differently than here in Malaysia.
I am missin New Zealand,even on my last few days I was feelin very down because going home didn't really seem like a good plan.And how right I was.
I'm so happy to meet my friends when I returned,but I long to live life as it comes again.I have been unable to do that since I returned.I constantly find myself being answerable to many people,and constantly find my feelings conveniently at disposal to people around me.There were days after I returned,that I would have given anything not to care about anyone.
The only person I actually cared about in NZ was Rean,and I was looking to do the same here.Sadly,looks like God have other plans for me.Or maybe I over expected?How I actually wished God would come and answer a question or two.
Well,NZ 'll definitely be in memory,along with Rean,along with the cold winds that blows at my face,along with the beautiful night filled with stars in the Southern Hemisphere sky,along with Skytower,along with all the wonderful people I met,along with the happy times of living life to its fullest..
Thanks for all the support,from each and everyone of you,I am looking forward to seeing you all again..and hope that things will eventually get better (quoted from Colleen,whom I met while working in the vineyards in the South Island ).
Miss you,NZ.